Mumbai – India

In a hastily organised meeting, in between the presentation ceremony and bedtime, the office of the under Secretary to the Secretary of the BCCI, in an effort to be more proactive in the eyes of the Secretary, discussed the potential possibility of capping the number of sixes that can be hit on any given T20 inning. The under secretary further elaborated stating that six hitting ability adds an undue advantage to any team capable of hitting sixes..

As our inside man informs, when the suggestion was made, the peon, who is now regarded as a the best tea maker in the country, asked, ‘Sir isn’t it counterproductive to the game, after all, the attraction in T20 is the big hitting’

To this, the under Secretary, to the Secretary, while searching for his cup of tea, simply replied;

“Young man, this office has to uphold the law as well as the pure sanctity of cricket, to the word. If every Tom, Dick and Harry is allowed to come and smash sixes at will, that gives that team that much of an extra advantage. We cannot have that. You tell me what will happen to the balance of cricket ya, bowlers will be forced to retire. Huh who will pay for their food and unemployment? You?”.

He then proceeded to bark orders, presumably at someone, though no one really took notice as no one was left. And since our inside man, on principle wasn’t there he didn’t, in theory, hear the under Secretary say, that we should also enforce a legal limit, a batsman is allowed to bend their elbow while hitting sixes.

Vikus Vandersmurf is a Connoisseur of Cricket.


Nagpur: India

In a hastily organised staff meeting, prior to morning tea, the office of the BCCI Honorary Secretary, discussed the legality, of questioning the legality of the Black Cap’s spinners bowling action, well after the game between India and New Zealand had concluded. The Secretary was very clear that he would still have questioned the legality of questioning the legality of the bowling action had the match result been different.

As our inside man within the premises reports that, when the announcement was made, a peon, who is highly regarded as a the best tea maker in the state, asked whether the timing of the investigation would create suspicion on the motives of the BCCI, especially given the BCCI is not officially the governing body of cricket, the Secretary, while sipping his cup of tea, simply replied;

“Young man, this office has to uphold the law as well as the pure sanctity of cricket, to the word. We cannot allow these spinners from around the world keep taking wickets, when there might be a chance that their actions can even be marginally over the legal limit prescribed by the ICC. After all, do not forget, that we are the guardian of the law and morals of our game. If we have been forced, even to our utmost regret, we must intervene and bring forth justice”

He then preceded to bark orders at his under secretary to also conduct a full investigation into the reasons why the four umpires involved in the match didn’t decide to report any of the bowling actions before or after the pre match warm up. Our inside man now outside enjoying a cup of Chai also reports, that the investigation was to also include any possibilities of the umpires being offered special treats & novelty fanfare during the innings break.

Vikus Vandersmurf is a Connoisseur of Cricket.


So it appears most us are really curious as to what indeed resides on Mohomad Yousufs beard. Or at least would like Afridi to take a bite and let us know.

Last week we asked you…

What other things would like you too see Afridi sink his teeth into?

* mohammad yousufs beard (35.0%, 52 Votes)
* eva mendes’s badonkadonk (23.0%, 35 Votes)
* jaques kallis’s moobs (15.0%, 22 Votes)
* his bat while he is batting (14.0%, 21 Votes)
* lalit modi’s wallet (13.0%, 19 Votes)

This week we ask you what Sachin’s secret might be to scoring all those runs.

< You know  what to do.)

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